they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
she farted while i was going down on her. not doing that again
The weird kid in front of me is reading an article titled "why don't i have a girlfriend?" the article then continues to talk about the mathematical equation for obtaining a girlfriend. exhibit a of why he is single
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
I need input, can I pre-game my cat scan?
It was ths the worst 15 minutes of my life. . . It was like fucking a warm stick of butter.
An open call to all exes! i have a drunk text policy that requires i delete any and all texts after drink 3, however i have reason to believe i have done something stupid. if i have texted you that "I love you", "miss you" and/or conveyed any interest in getting back together with you in the last 24 hours i was belligerent and lying. That is all.
found out that hot proper business chick in my class A) did a bar crawl last 2 night and still showed up to class and B) is 19 and C) so not as proper as I thought D) is single. How the fuck does that work? Freaking superwoman.
He never broke character while fucking me on the neighbor's lawn. I give him a 10 for his dedication to the British accent.
Let's get drunk and go to Walmart and just tackle people at random.
Did you really get 12 corn dogs from the gas station last night?
She complimented my boobs and then told me I smelled like teddy bears before falling asleep on the floor.
So I don't know, I'm not a doctor, but I might be juggling dates with 3 different guys...
Seeking encouragement from my tinder matches to ace this test. I've sunk to a newest low.
Listen I don't care what it's called as long as it's drugs
Randomize
