So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
i got kicked out of Barns and Nobles cuz i put all the bibles in the fiction section
he stopped mid-fuck to ask me how my day was....
This got awkward about two "Oh yeah"s ago.
She gave me a blow job and her mom gave me blueberry muffin afterwards. I love them.
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
I just met the neighbor hes a self proclaimed coke dealer/ softporn producer.
How do I tell a friend I drunkenly broke into his house and may have lost his dog
You shouted "FUCK SHANIA TWAIN" and then downed an Aquafina bottle of white wine none of us knew how to react
Lube filled water balloons always make for a good time
Haha it's harder than you'd think to come up with ways to turn your penis into a Christmas drawing
We were having a serious discussion about Blue's Clues and I just kept thinking, 'you've seen me naked'.
I never thought that at some point in my life I would end up in the back of a cop car dressed as Pumba #HakunaMatata
What is more embarrassing, shitting yourself in Mexico or having sex in a forest preserve with a 19 yr old? This is crucial research.
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
Randomize
