I thought all girls wanted is to get a boner
you want to re-phrase that?
On a scale of 1 to 10 how hot is the girl you're about to fuck?
Strong 6
That's an oxymoron.
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
her cat watched me eat her out... I would use the alternate term for both of those things but it's too weird.
You haven't puked in my sink in over a year.. Youre coming over this weekend
You know it was a good weekend when; you leave a bi-lingual letter of apology on top of a stack of cash for hotel housekeeping.
If by "in control" you mean him showing-up to work wasted, calling a customer a "fuckstick," and getting fired on the spot? Then yes, he is.
If i want her back i know all i have to do is sleep with a specific handful of her closest friends. That method is tried and true.
I gave the bathroom attendant $5 last night for turning the sink on for me. What. The. Fuck.
We need to get stoned and watch Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 2. This has become a priority. Schedule accordingly.
Let us ponder on the good times. Ya know when the Jonas brothers were incapable of growing facial hair and I didn't fully understand what a dick looks like
I asked him to sing a song so he couldn't hear me throwing up as he was holding my hair
You gave me the best orgasm of my life. I'm buying you a house
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
besides the unzipped fly, the black eye and the toilet paper on your shoe you looked really sexy today baby!
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