i'm signing you up for texting rehab
Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
That's ok. Our relationship has a solid foundation of booze and questionable behavior.
I turned down free cocaine. I both respect and regret and that decision.
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
Well, there goes the no drunk sex injuries resolution.
woke up this morning in the hall outside of my parents room with a sign taped to myself that said "im sorry"...
Sorry my moustache came off because I was face first in a layered bucket full of jello shots.
I'll probably just close my eyes and point to a random name. That will be my vote.
I just realised how much we're failing the women's suffrage movement right now.
Mm. I just want to eat pancakes off of his fine ass.
at crossfit today a guy shit his pants while deadlifting 405 lbs. coach made fun of him then congratulated him on his new personal record.
I just found (and ate) a chunk of a reese's that fell between my boobs. Problem is that I finished those off 3 days ago in a drunk induced sob session... Has it really been that long since I changed my clothes?!
Typical Sunday morning text...are you alive?
She just took all of the blankets in the house and threw them in the yard, because 'the grass was cold'..
After returning from the hospital with lock-jaw from getting tackle at the game. Some naked chick busted out of his room and hit him with a devastating haymaker to the jaw because he wouldn't have sex
Randomize
