brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
I got wasted for the 1st time and I sat in a fridge for 2 hours and a trash can?
i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
Did we use protection last night?
Um, no...keep in touch, okay?
He managed to completely creep out every girl I was with last night. It was almost inspiring how efficient it was.
I slept with him to see his dog one last time
You would not believe how incredibly hard it is to climb on top of a three story apartment buildings roof from the air conditioning unit
YOU DID DRUGS AFTER A THREESOME WHO ARE YOU TO JUDGE ME?!!?
she just stared at nothing and then looked at me and goes, "that's a weird place to put the wall"
wow, being home for Xmas is freaking weird on tinder. I went to high school with everyone I'm matching... The fact that this many jocks like me now is a huge ego boost from my lack of glory days.
...and I'm done. I just matched two boys I used to babysit without realizing it.
My pubic hair is shaved into the shape of mistletoe.
I hope that's a joke and if not I need a snap of it
I'm taking a shit break of discontent as a personal protest
You're never the same once you're dry humped on the frat house floor
Can someone please remind me later tonight that there's a taco in my purse. I may get drunk and forget I put it there
I don't drink nearly as much when I'm coupled, and that's not a lifestyle I can commit to
Randomize
