I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
She's got an ass you could write the declaration of independence on in one line. Takes up three bar stools.
I dreamt I won the Huge Cock Championship last night. It was glorious.
The lack of respect you have for your penis baffles me. I'd rather rub my ball sack on public toilet seats than stick my dick in some of those girls.
A simple 'no' would have sufficed
She's singing So Happy Together to her burrito, I want to be on her level.
shes trying to book us all flights to Ireland..I let her get mine and yours but stopped her when she tried booking the guy next to her at the library
Woke up with a full plate of KFC next to my face. I didn't really question it.
So last night ended up making out with a girl going to jail on sunday...she wrote down her address so I can make conjugal visits...
Is it weird to say that Kobe reminds me of a wise brontosaurus?
My mom just gave me my fake back to buy her more wine.
No just a slight sexual miscommunication which led to a little (lot) vomiting by one party and a bruised sternum on the other party involved.
I can't even make a guess how that goes.
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
I hope none of us try to run for public office one day
Please tell me I did not drink enough whiskey to think that having sex with my boyfriend while his best friend was on the floor next to us was a good idea.
We spent our last night together taking turns vomiting in the bathroom. I'd say it was a romantic trip.
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