my vagina is like the nba. its where amazing happens.
I think we should involve a squid next time we fuck.
u kno there is a reason i dont tell mi friends about u
You tried to call the hospital and left a voicemail asking if you could be put on the liver transplant list as a "pre-caution"
twelve hours since my last beer and i just blew a .08, time to go to the library
and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
I'm not sure what happened last night, but I have someone stored in my phone as 'Aftershock'
I pulled my tongue muscle last night. your welcome.
I don't think he realizes it but he was stroking the faucet while he was talking to me.
You might have crossed the line by jerking off while she was in the bathroom taking a prego test. Just saying
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
I just figured out the time exactly by how many shots and beers that I've had since this morning. I either have a terrible problem, or a great solution.
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
He's been watching the World Cup too much because right before he came he screamed "NUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" for half a minute. Our landlord is not happy.
is that a dick in a sweater?
All I could think about was how many vaginas had been on the toliet that I was pukin in
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