the best part about being a teacher is there are always 20 little kids around me to blame my farts on
They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
And your hair- I'd make sure to pee on it first.
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
I'm still not completely convinced I'm not pregnant. I just dipped beef jerky in cream cheese frosting.
Call me when your ready for an explanation about the ham in your vagina.
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
Because selling drugs to kids never goes out of business. We get older, they stay the same stupid.
GOT MY PERIOD AND AN INTERNSHIP OFFER THIS IS A WONDERFUL DAY
I just ironed my gstring.. this is please fuck my brains out on a whole new level.
where will you be at 9:30 tonight?
piledriving you in your roommate's bed?
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
IDK MAYBE BC I WOKE UP IN AN AIRPORT WITH A ONE WAY TICKET TO LONDON
Dude we need to hang out soon. I'm in the mood to get arrested again.
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
Randomize
