Hey when you come over to pick me up in the mornin bring a camera. This is going to be legendary. Don't knock.... They might cover up
Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
Like if I don't roll around in my puke, the night will be a failure.
they were having a wine tasting so i tasted every wine...then knocked over an entire display of gourmet olives and was asked to leave... but they still let me buy my 6 bottles of wine before escorting me out
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
found a cell phone. in the freezer. wrapped in bologna. explain?
That is correct. I did in fact somehow pass out in the tanning booth for over an hour. And yes the attendant did have to open it up and shake me awake.
He scratched off my spray tan. Literal nail marks down my back. Can't imagine what's underneath his fingernails.
Is it too early in the day to be getting dressed for the strip club?
my mom tried to talk to me about my drinking, i somehow turned it around on her, now shes going to AA and I'm going to the bar.
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST.
I'm currently using a band-aid to cover my bar stamp from last night while I ask my professor for an extension. That's a sign of getting more responsible, right?
Maverick's sitting in jail wearing a turkey costume and I am soooo jealous.
Imp drunk. It'd free popcorn tuedday I love life.
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