There's a sucker born every minute but swallowers are harder to find.
So glad I found your sister.
I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
Theres two guys using a blow up doll to hold their beers while they float around the pool
Im on my way, tell them to get ready for a high-five
martini and pecan pie.. breakfast of champions.
I've slowly been stuffing french fries down his pants. I'm at 31 and he hasn't even noticed.
Ps there is nothing more humbling in the world than havin to watch cheaper by the dozen on the waiting room tv while getting the morning after pill at the drs. Nothing
It's really sad that I'm trying to calculate in my head the type of place to have dinner that's worth anal
You can laugh all you want but 99 grapes is a lot stronger than what you were drinking.
I was so fucked up last night that I peed on his FATHER'S BED and fell asleep there. and yes. his father was asleep in the bed
My liver is fucking rocky. Get knocked down 7 times and gets up 8. World champ
I know it's my dream I got hurt enough to leave work but not hurt enough to stop drinking
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination
I dont even know what happened i just remember waking up with beer cans outlining my body...
Guy just rode past on a lowrider bike smoking a blunt, I want his life
I can tell just by looking at the wedding photos that the groom has hooked up with at least three of his groomsmen. I would feel bad for her except that she’s hooked up with two of the same ones.
Randomize
