SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
Just gave my little brother the collection of clothes that boys have left in my room since I've been in college for his birthday.
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
May God have mercy on my new vibrator.
She was our DD the least I could do is have sex with her. Even when drunk I'm still chivalrous.
Ok, it is technically a gay bar but it's a total dive w/ strong drinks. The important thing is you can start drinking at 11:00 am without judgement
oh oh oh, and apparently you can bring in your own snacks. Some old dude just gave me cashews and cheetos.
I remember three things: you falling down an entire flight of stairs, me stripping out of your Christmas one-sie to do cartwheels in my underwear, and people standing above me saying, "where did that bump on her head come from?"
Also, I was told I kept the antlers on the entire time. I'm deeming last night a success.
Malt liquor mondays...better in theory.
I made my own utility belt like Batman. It has a cup holder for my beer, cell phone holder, a little pocket for condoms, and a sewing kit just in case.
I was the girl at the bar last night passing out free condoms and making sure everyone knew how to use them to keep the population down
Everyone should know the rule that if your dicks touch during a threeway you just make lightsaber noises and move on.
Oddly enough I feel totally fine now. Clonazapam and red bull the breakfast of champions.
He just compared our sex to a grand slam on Wii fitness
You're doing it right
I just baptized you in budweriser and you were cool with it
Ugh. All the good hoes are in their third trimester.
Randomize
