I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
Piggyback rides are my preferred mode of transportation.
He showed up to the Seder drunk and tried to convince everyone that he could read Hebrew.
I wish guys would just cum water 'cause you don't have to worry about being pregnant and it'd be like a squirt gun fight
I'm sick of being broke. I had vicodin and frosting for lunch.
i'm almost positive she was a dude but like it doesn't even matter
re read what you just said
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
Do they sell "congrats in losing your virginity!" cards and do they come in gay?
You just accidentally called me. You kept saying "Really?! Really?!!" So I can only assume you are having sub par sex
Damn you are the highwater mark of the naked women in my life. Like idk what lined up but yeah.
As much as my throat was opened up this weekend, you'd think I wouldn't nearly choke on a damn almond.
No joke. There's a picture of the priest I made out with on my parents' refrigerator.
We ended up shitfaced at the house after the Super Bowl trying to get someone from Scientology on the phone.
I was told today that I'm the ugliest bartender in the area, so, I guess I have that going for me.
Was cussing out our DD when one of the strippers takes him backstage. WTF
They call him magic hands is all I know.
Somethings are best left a mystery
Randomize
