ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
He kept singing "who's that peekin in my window" we thought he was high til we realized someone was lookin in the windows.
I'm either watching Fifth Element or Hotel Rwanda. There's black people and white people and high life tall boy 18 packs are $11.99 so I could be watching my own hand. I have no idea.
Harry Potter. Singing. Sobering up. In that order.
I just threw up over a bridge. I didn't even know there was a bridge in this town. Vodka is like a transportation device.
I found him stumbling up to our building with a solo cup under his arm. . . He told me it was his favourite thing ever. He also told me hes never been drunk before.
I have full custody of my vagina however you are granted visiting hours
You kept yelling in my face " YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TO SUCK A DICK TONIGHT!"
You should come by for the fire station blow job tour
Me and tommy were trying to figure out why our printer was jammed, found a condom stuck in the paper slot. #collegeprobs
So apparently I was a completely different person lastnight, one who drinks scotch and makes out with 55 year old men who look like inspector gadget
We met some guy at the beach, and dug a hole with him. He invited us to "come back at night and smoke a blunt in this hole"
Godammit I caught my hair on fire taking a bong rip
Do you think it's a bad sign of the outcome of the pregnancy test I'm about to take that I was eating a fudgsicle on the way into the drugstore? Would it make worse to tell you I also bought a big ass bag of Cornnuts?
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