like what am i supposed to say "im thinking of how bad that sex was"?
And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
I got drunk and smashed his tv with the keg and so he blames me for being evicted.
You probably don't remember this but last night I bought you a lap dance from a stripper that had nipples that looked like runny eggs....you're welcome.
As I sit on the toilet at 4 am I realize tonight could have gone a lot better
Never ever ever ever ever ever give your number to a 30 year old at buffalo wild wings. Ever ever ever.
Legitimate concern. Who am I going to have birthday sex with?
Apparently I'm not allowed to call at 3am anymore and ask to speak to all his siblings. I was just trying to get to know the family
TONIGHT IS GOING TO BE A FUCKING BLAST. EVEN IF I HAVE TO SET OFF A BUNCH OF FIREWORKS IN YOUR KITCHEN.
You lit a fire in my vagina no man can extinguish.
You peed on a pole and declared to a cop that it was your pole and yelled at him to not even look at it, and then yelled at all of us for looking at it.
I'm almost too old to be on The Real World but feel like I'm too young to be on The Bachelor and I'm just really confused with my place in life.
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
We can't shop at Hobby Lobby anymore. They don't like Plan B which basically runs through our veins.
He had a tattoo of a crown above his penis. He was AMAZING! It was well deserved. LONG LIVE THE KING!
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