omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
He just bought a 100-pack of condoms of Amazon. My vagina is already tired.
My last google search last night was 'vodka swimming pool'.
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
so why was i the only one who woke up with ham stuck to my ass?
My weekend will be all about the double d's, desert & debauchery
That was an excessively violent trivia night
She was blowing me when her roommate came in and goes "you want me to tap in?"
You realize once your inheritance is finalized this shit will stop happening right?
Nothing better than going to Mass on Easter Sunday with "I love penis" henna tattooed across your back. Love your Indian culture.
I AM A HOUSE CAT. I CANNOT DO THIS LION BUSINESS WE CALL THE SINGLE LIFE
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
After this week, alcohol is mandatory.
Are you done yet? I've eaten three corndogs so I'm ready 2 party.
"Being an adult" and "being happy" are two circles that do not overlap in my Venn diagram of life.
Randomize
