whatcha mean you cant get rid of genital warts? thats not what my girlfriend says
she was using a pencil to fish crushed adderall out of a plastic bag. it was like a college version of fun dip
after last night i think it would be a good idea if i wrote a will... you know, just in case.
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
He stole her cigarettes and walked 15 miles just so he wouldn't have to wake up next to her. God I love being a lesbian.
do you think the bartender judged us for asking for shots of well vodka and water chasers?
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
Porn. Physics. Porn. Icecream. Porn. That's my life now.
"If it gets you high just do it" I told him he was the Nike of drug abuse
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
I guess "Ass Fun Friday" is not a thing no matter how many times I say it or bring it up in conversation...
And we had three hours of crazy sex then his roommate ate pizza off me while I was sleeping.
We need to talk about your improper dealings with the town drug dealer.
Parade of Dicks...that's what I'm calling 2017
I had to put my dog down, accidentally outed my brother, and was given a fucking fish sandwich instead of a Big Mac ALL IN ONE DAY! Am I really the person you want to consult for advice? Hhhmmmmmm?
Randomize
