508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
In a car. Threw up in my mouth. Haven't said a word in 10 minutes.
Smoked a blunt with a girl i met at the bus stop today. What you did today is irrelevant
I told him not to mix beer with his Dr. Pepper...his reply was "i'm a grown ass man i'll do what i want". Judging by the sounds coming out of the bathroom he regrets not listening to me.
Apparently I was proudly showing him the cup I barfed pizza rolls into
I got my first tattoo & injured myself while having sex in a national monument. I say we consider this weekend siezed.
He fell backwards into a full bathtub but didn't spill a single drop of the beer in his hand. What a pro.
Is 1:30 too early for the bar?
Do you want my opinion or society's?
I want your company
And then I fed you egg rolls in bed as you were screaming I'm moving out
Some guy is in my phone as Pat McAwesome.
I just had sex with the male version of myself. looks, mindset, even our boob to dick ratio was the same
Just because your drunk doesn't mean you can stick your dick in the snow. Just a FYI
he was almost the father of your baby, you should let him take you to dinner
Randomize
