I want 2 things right now, you or a cig
cig
chasing schnapps with beer is a terrible idea. never been drunk at 3PM before. please help please please please please
and the award for most disgusting thing ever done on my couch now officially goes to you! Congratulations, you won the couch...I can't even look at it anymore.
this lesbian fantasy crush is getting WAY out of hand. just spent an entire meeting staring at her long fingers thinking, "oh those could be fun"
Was I holding a cat when you saw me? Because that was the height of that party for me.
the japanese bartender dressed as a cowboy in assless chaps just told me i was too drunk for another shot
They're having lesbian sex while I play super mario world. I hope they like the music
Idk but she keeps giving me s'mores and I'm having a hard time caring about her alcoholism because of it
we broke the bed, curtan rods, a dresser drawer, and unless I didn't notice it before, we put a hole in the wall. This is why he and I have to fuck in motels.
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
Will you be super villain lesbian lovers with me for halloween?
Jesus fuck that was emotional whiplash
You woke up in between the boxspring and the matress in a random dorm room.
Drunk. Come get me. Out front blue shirt.
Where are you? And you borrowed my shirt. I know what you're wearing. How wasted are you?
Hotel
WHICH HOTEL??
I think the cats may be lesbians. It could just be a two hour mutual bath but it sure looks like a 69.
Randomize
