Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
His shopping cart was nothing but malt liquor and zucchini.
Dude, somewhere around here makes 4loko slushies. I just decided coming home isn't so bad.
Unless you can cure my hangover with your penis I'm not interested.
Why isn't there a sort by hair color option on Facebook? It would make stalking much easier.
I had to feed him the pizza because he was too blazed to do it himself
I feel like a cloud. A cloud that wants to be laid.
Why must everything this weekend have to do with something going into or coming out of my vagina?
It was a mess. I sat on the kitchen floor with maple whiskey and cried into a bowl of poutine. I've never even been to canada
I'm abstinent now
Oh, is this one of the times when you're serious?
I'd like to buy a season pass to your dick please.
Some guy is here to get laser hair removal on his balls. I hate my job.
Cmon. I wasn't that bad.
You stumbled ass first into the litter box, and everytime we tried to get you to move you said " if I fits. I sits."
Randomize
