do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
He moved away. I mourned his dick all of Sunday. I feel a little better now.
like we started out all organized and composed and within thirty mins people were throwing up in the bushes, arguing over a beer bong and jumping in the pool with their clothes on
I legitimately woke up with a girl trying to snort cocaine off my dick.
I'm drinking vodka out of a coffee pot. and i'm not even mad about it
No. I didn't know. I thought mid afternoon shots meant the day could only get better.
Cognac is not meant to be taken in shots. I just wanted you to know the desperation of last night.
How did it go last night?
Woke up head half shaved and a burrito? So good and bad?
All i've had today is coffee and ketchup packets. I need a job like yesterday.
It's that moment where you find out the girl you've been dating for 6 months is a mob daughter. Post breakup.
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
And now you understand the importance of Saturday naps.
Because you stay up all night having sex and eating sushi?
He literally cried into his tacos and screamed fuck bitches. Don't know if it was the best, or the worst hook up, ever.
i just want to die with dignity and clean teeth, is that too much to ask?
I tied him up for his boyfriend so he could get fisted... I'm the best roommate ever.
Wow. That's certainly more than I've ever done for a roommate.
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