So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
We were all singing so you said you were going to play a percussion instrument... the crackers.
I wouldnt consider it a good Wednesday if there wasn't any projectile vomit involved
I feel like death gave me a hand job
It feels like eating ice cream while riding a unicorn over a rainbow waterfall made of glitter.
That is possibly the gayest thing that was ever thought of by anyone anywhere.
I FEEL like I celebrated someone's 21st, but really I just celebrated Tuesday.
Why do you need me to cover for work?
I wouldn't say NEED but lets just say I smell like guacamole and semen.
I feel like im becoming the girl who only drunk texts him. I would be in the dog house, if situations like this had dog houses.
Had a turkey baster with clean pee in it in my pants to pass a drug test, and the bottom fell off, so yeah I'm pretty pissed.
He told me he felt like he was just pistol-whipped by Testicle Man.
It's the happiest looking penis I've ever seen. It should have a top hat and a spectacle on and soft shoe across the room with a cane. He's a cheery little feller.
When i said i was brazilian i swear to god he started to tear up
I HAVE A STRAIGHT LINE ACROSS MY ASS ABOUT THE WIDTH OF A SLIM JIM. ERICA!
I call bullshit
Call it what ever you want I just need to figure out how to get permanent marker off my cock
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
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