i think i gave myself a perma-hangover. or god just hates me.
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
I know I should be focused on nurturing their bright little minds but it's 10 a.m. and I need a cock in my mouth
Yes. I am getting trashed on an open tab while judging a karoke competition
Impressive. I approve.
He used the panoramic camera on his iPhone to take a picture of his dick. And it actually filled it. Pretty sure I just came.
it was like a shit fog rolling out of the east to encompass me and have it's way with me
I mean, I introduced myself as "the after party". I think he knew early in the night he was in for a bangathon.
Steve, that episode of cops where your dealer rear-ended that family is on again.
She text me that night and asked how the dick was and I quote my drunk self "average at best"
Hypothetically speaking - is it bad if you get cut off at an airport bar at 11:30am?
If you ever tell anyone I offered you boob squeezes for cheetos, I'll kill you
Have you heard yourself have sex?
I'm not THAT loud...
My neighbors filed a noise complaint.
You're moving up the public shitting ladder
Remeber when we went camping and fucked those two guys? Yeah me either but I'm covered in poison oak so I'm guessing it's from that.
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