you think thats bad? Today I had to pop a zit on my sack.
And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
the 24 hour champagne diet aint going so well
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
Pizza delivery...for when you need to eat your feelings for the sex you aren't having
Psh a bachelors degree is the new adulthood. We're all just pretending anyways. I'm sitting on my boyfriends couch while he's passed out drunk. In my lap. On a Wednesday. And he's a nurse. See, pretending to be an adult
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
Nothing kills the mood quicker than kneeing him in the face during sex
Too stoned. Randomly can't get the image of Emilio estevez's smiling face out of my head. What is life.
Leaving Denver airport I just saw a group of young Republicans in matching green T-shirts that said "4/20 Baby!"
I haven't gotten dressed in 4 days. God bless you, unemployment.
he was wearing a pyjama shirt under a dress shirt under a hoodie under a robe under a rain poncho the man was prepared for anything
Tonight’s your last chance for a danger free blowjob.
oh what is to come when my single life starts with a threesome?
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