so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
he threw up all over himself while laying down.. it was like watching old faithful, but with noodles and vodka
Writing apology letters and leaving them on peoples doors for your actions is NOT what I want to be doing at 6am.
sooo....i just remembered that someone fed me a pretzel out of their purse at the bar last night.
That is the best grammar in a dirty text ever. Excellent use of the semi-colon. And yes; I am hard.
Of course I'm not above using aladdin and pot to get laid, this is america
I ran into the bouncer who kicked me out of that beach bar a few months ago. I told him I'd only been thrown out of two other places since then. He was proud.
If you've ever wanted to get filthy in a Catholic church before 2 on a Wednesday, I might be your guy.
Nothings harder than putting on a frozen condom.. or should I say softer
Pain in my heart, regret in my vagina
Doug the spinning teacher gave me chlyamdia
There's a fly in my room repeatedly throwing itself at my window, and I feel it's really symbolic of what I want to do with my future
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
Not only do I have a well-defined bite mark on my arm, but I also have a perfectly clear bruise of a handprint wrapped around my arm like a tribal tattoo. Thoughts on how that happened?
This morning, I found 5 naked people in Steve's bed with post sex hair, and Steve fully clothed sleeping on the ground.
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