Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
sorry i interrupted the heart to heart you were having with your bathrobe last night
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
apparently i was just sitting there with my shirt down holding my boobs saying "its ok. its all gonna be ok"
He somehow managed to accomplish karate kicking a door down, cockblocking my friend in the room, and writing "tits" all over the house with a blue sharpie.
Some guy dressed like Santa just handed me a bottle of tequila. I NEVER WANT TO LEAVE CANCUN
is year to celebrate how much I love you, I made a mosaic of your penis with conversation hearts. it's in your mailbox.\n\nHAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY TO YOU
Hey, umm this is awkward but I want to apologize in case you find gum in your pubes. Not sure if I swallowed it or spit it out. It's all a blur.
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
When you mimic motorboating Jennifer Love Hewitt, is it really that hard to understand why no one thinks you're straight?
I didn't talk to any girls wearing masks because I wanted to avoid making the big mistake of making out with my sister.
I called him a "Beautiful Bastard" with "Beautiful Bastard Hair". That is how you pick up a guy from Denmark.
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
Couch. On fire.
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