A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women
Yeah, but I'm out of licorice and there's no way anywhere near here will rent us all mopeds on a Tuesday night.
Is there a fine for having sex in the back of a zipcar?
It feels like New Years Day all over again...me trying desperately not to throw up in the backseat & mom and dad blissfully unaware in the front
I had so much stripper lotion and body glitter on my glasses I had a hard time driving home.
I'm still getting random messages from guys about my Halloween outfit. Electrical tape is coming back next year
It only takes one line of cocaine, and you try to shotput a fucking kitchen table
Moral of the story: fuckboys never change
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
Lets get drunk. But not too drunk that I can't work in the morning. But maybe drunk enough so we'll make out
The neighbors in the apartment above us are at it again. The roleplay this time is cop and prostitute. I give it 30 minutes, you? Already sounds better than the last one
Some guy at the bar last night bought us Arrowhead water and I was so drunk, it tasted good
I kept my extra Molly pill in my wallet in the change part, that's also where I keep my body jewelry while I'm working. The nose ring punctured the pill essentially coating itself in MDMA. My nose ring is back in my nose. This could be entertaining
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
