some girl in front of me in class just googled "hungover+throwing up blood"
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
Just hide your weed in your baby brothers shirt. TSA wont check a baby, thats fucked up
Just drive me around campus, I will be able to smell their innocence.
That's so unfortunate for him bc you can always find another penis, but he's stuck with it
I smell like Captain Morgan and tears
Your whole purpose in life is to just float around and satisfy lonely women and also join lesbian couples in threesomes.
So Monday we're lesbians.
Deal. This decision is final and any rebates on this will result in losing an eyeball.
My mind just played a snippet of me asking to be a Joey and trying to climb into your apron pocket...
It's a good thing you're straight. You'd make a horrible lesbian.
If she didn't block me, she would have known that I sneezed on her toothbrush.
dude, you ran into a window then asked ME what the fuck I was doing.
He just kept pissing on the couch as we were yelling at him while he repeatedly told us "its going to be okay".
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
He made me pay for half of dinner. Fucking feminist revolution.
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