sorry about last night, I don't know what happened but I woke up this morning and looked strikingly similar to courtney love, it had to be bad.
i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
she met some random, took his vcard, peed in his bed, left, and then requested him as her boyfriend on facebook
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
where's my purse there's an important taco in it
Thats why you always identify the subtext of a blowjob before you accept it.
I have been drinking since 2. And I'm now chasing the cat around the house with a light saber. Anna's helping.
Trying to convince myself that everyone keeps staring at me because I'm pretty and not because of my hickies.
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
Just had to kick my 26 yr old boyfriend out of my bed before getting the kids up for school. Have I mentioned being 41 doesn't suck as much as all the hype.
Remember the thing I sent you? "Often complex problems are best solved by thinking like an animal." Hump away!
The little girl I'm babysitting is having a tea party, the water and chips she's passing out are doing wonders for my hangover.
She's like the sister I never had that I want to bang.
Buying a new bed right now. My options are limited because I need to be able to be tied to it.
Update: pile o Coke party starting at approx 4 - 7 and going until 1ish to celebrate our founding fathers and love of cocaine and hatred of everyone\n
Randomize
