ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
our drinking schedule never changed, we just drank at work.
im using the astroglide sample u sent me as a bookmark for the book im using to write my midterm paper. i need to get laid. bad.
all i could think was her face looked like a farm accident
yeah, but the first step is admitting you have a problem, the next step is kidnapping him
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
Nothing says happy valentines day like waking up to a naked man you hooked up with taking a walk of shame
Oh Jesus. Are you going to the hospital?
No I'm showering then leaving for Vegas
You're like a human soul vacuum cleaner.
I just want somebody to fondle my boobs while I read fanfiction. Is that too much to ask?
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
We went from him going down on me to swapping baby pictures of our moms.
You can't just bring up bondage and then stop answering me
We're playing drunken roulette. We're taking exlax followed by shots. First person to shit themselves loses!
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
Randomize
