At least we lost an hour tonight! Less time to make a fool of myself
lesson #67 learned in college: a three day old margarita, is still a margarita.
Revelation of the day. Bulimia is dumb. Anorexia is easier.
You suck.
I think vodka calistinics prior to and during beer olympics was a bad idea
I cant leave dude. theres a horse with a top hat on
It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
I don't know who the girl crying at my kitchen table eating gravy from the KFC container is, but I feel like she could be my soulmate
Dude, I fucked her last night with nothing but my bandana on. Like straight Indian chief style.
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
If Boring and Monotone had a love child, it would be this guy.
STOP PUTTING PICTURES OF JONAH HILL IN MY KITCHEN CABINETS!
Just keep your throat open and beer will always find its way in.
My concern for you and peanut butter is the reason I am still awake.
Ur betting me $100 that I can't do ur sister?
Randomize
