loyola was giving a tour this morning and they all saw me in a half ripped off toga throwing up over the side of the dorm stairs
you don't even go to loyola anymore
you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
He just said "Chunky" very loudly in his sleep.
I just opened a bunch of old flavored condoms just to see what they tasted like.
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
Always thought my first night in jail would consist of fire and a bunny suit.
I think he liked me better when I only opened my mouth to suck his dick.
She stopped mid-blowjob to introduce herself to us
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
I'm stoned as hell watching the new Star Trek movie. My life is 110% better than it was an hour ago.
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
Can I tell you that I just incorporated the spice girls in my sexting and you not judge me
That was the second worst thing to happen to my asshole.
Dude she smelled like bar-b-que sauce. I can't think of anything better.
I'm gonna try and get through this weekend sober, which is gonna be tough especially since I've already started drinking.
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