3:38a: you guys up to anything right now?
Coming down off exstacy at a church event. Resisting the urge to dance to the church hymns.
TBS has betrayed me by telling me tyler perry is funny
I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
The only piece of furniture in the apartment is a wine rack.
Dude I need help. What word is complimentary, but sounds like "chunky"?
I banged her roommate when she was gone. She came back with a chicken sandwich and a bj. Then she said " smells like my roommates vagina" I think I can get a threesome tonight
I would totes be making out with random people in the name of america if I was at the white house right now
If I had a dollar for every straight boy that questioned their sexuality because of me, I would live a comfortable middle-class life.
Had a burrito last night in your honor
That's the nicest thing you've ever done
Hey Cat, it's Michael. You made out with me for a hot dog last night and I feel super used.
I woke up at 3:30 this morning to pee. Luckily, I didn't have to travel far as I was asleep in my CLOSET on my yoga mat. Good news is I had a pillow...
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
Randomize
