Cab driver just said he likes mutual masturbation in the cab. Um
no one is going to fuck you in a field of bunnies
bet u 5 dollars u can't guess were i woke up this morning
oh god.. jail?
better, on the catwalk of the auditorium
well once we started drinking vodka out of wine glasses there was no turning back
I think he just gave me the 'I used to sleep with your sister' discount
He rode my dog to the bathroom and wouldn't stop laughing once he got in. It was scary.
This is breast cancer awareness month... The least we can do is give a stripper some singles.
He fucked a girl named Oreo... He deserved syphilis.
I'd like to stay optimistic, but I have this nagging suspicion my penis is in for a disappointing holiday weekend.
I just want him to come back from NOLA alive, without an arrest record or stripper glitter on his clothes...
Those seems like unreasonable expectations for a bachelor party honestly...
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
I climbed out of the shower to him sitting on the floor trimming his pubes with nail clippers, we both just started laughing at how drunk we were
one more hour of this work bullshit and I'm off to get high with your cat.
the guy working the counter at the liquor store noticed i got my haircut and said it was pretty.....
The guy next to me on the bus has one hole in his jeans that has over 20 mini dicks drawn on his leg. Classic.
Randomize
