Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.
we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
Sometimes i wish my penis was detachable that way i could take it off sometimes so i wouldnt get into these situations
I could barely talk to the cabbie and I was text bombing everyone. They need to make an auto timer app to prevent people like me from belligerent late night harrassing. And I was seeing double... Prob would have tried to give your leg a bj and then fallen down the stairs.
A guy in the dance floor is raising the roof with an axe in hand. I love Halloween.
You grabbed your house keys, threw them at the door and asked, "did it open?"
My entire grocery store purchase consisted of Little Debbie snacks and Budweiser
Who knew a blowjob could cause this kind of crazy
He wasn't prepared for it
PSA- Wearing assless chaps results in embarrassingly painful sunburn
Hey remind me the get the pancakes out of my jacket
I was told I look like trouble once and that was by a fireman at the sex show. I was carrying two beers and a penis pinata.
I got home and he was wearing a suit. He said he reason was because it was shirt and tie Saturday and that he won't change until midnight. He then proceeded to answer the door in a British accent.
I'm sorry i showed you my boobs.. I probably shouldn't have done that.
I'm like a bad decision making factory. I need to sit down and have a chat with my decision making elves.
Mandatory face masks - finally, a solution for lip augmentation failures and bad breath.
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