I need help removing her.
I just ran from Santa Claus in Kroger
She looks makes a Zellweger face when she cums, she's keeps asking why I call her renee
I love when I'm alone in the house. It's like pants were never invented.
Made a pan flute out of the varyingly empty beer bottles on the table. Played a glorious tune that paid tribute to the winds.
I just wanna go somewhere and not be judged for wearing spandex shorts that make my ass look like a slice of fucking heaven. Is that so much to ask??
More cowboy butts than you can shake a stick at, oh joy.
Cops are just so fun an beautifuk
I'll just save you what dignity you have left by letting what happened die with your lack of memory and/or liver.
Got too starbucks. 3out of the 4 girls working i have ducked and haven't ever called. My coffee has dick written on it. It may contain spit by pumpkin lattes are only once a year
He came to my Harry Potter marathon wearing a Hogwarts uniform. Of course I fucked him.
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
Had a dream we were competing for tomatos.
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
I only gave you one rule about using the beach house: don’t get cum on anything!
You’ve seen my tits! You had to know that rule was unrealistic! Does it help that he was really cute?
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