Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
So I purposely left a bunch of metal in my pockets so that the smokin hot TSA officer would give me a pat down. Airport security just got fun
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
I need someone to meet me at the end of the road and throw captain morgan at my face like they do with water at marathons
Went home drunk last night and peed on my Christmas tree, my mothers going to fucking kill me
A man just poked my foot with his crutches while I'm shitting. Is that how the disabled gays ask for a glory hole blow jay?
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
I can say with 87% certainty that i received one of the world's five greatest blow jobs since the Coolidge administration on Saturday night.
Can we just smoke a few bowls and eat grilled cheese while drunk in our hotdog suits at 9am ?
I think I need a restraining order. I had 15 "selfies" of him on my camera roll......my phone has a lock code on it.
You also thought the cure to hiccups was drowning yourself (and you were right)
You can't just say you're dying of terminal cancer everytime they try to card you
While I'm here in reality dreaming of catching chili cheese fries with my mouth out of t shirt guns like Jesus is real
Randomize
