its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
Even if you were sober, spitters are STILL quitters, end of story.
Drunk at a girls little league game. Hello summer.
I wasn't sure if "you're even prettier in the dark" was a compliment. Hmm.
i had the all of mcdonalds chanting USA as he motorboated you
Put you drinking hat aside for Tuesday. My buddy is bartending!
I just puked in my drinking hat.
Question: would asking the hot guy from the grocery store to "beer me" his number be a poor decision?
you got us kicked out of the restaurant for trying to pee in the trash can.
Come over. We have tacos... And girls who took their clothes off. But mainly, tacos.
Everyone was in jail by 10:30. I'd say it was a successful bachelor party.
The old guy next door tried to get me to go to his apartment for shots formoonshine. =-0
If that weren't so sketchy I would encourage it
Yeah it was almost as sketchy as a white panel van pulling up offering candy
Son of a bitch took my liquid eyeliner
We were getting breakfast he shit himself in the middle of ihop. Mid bite he just yells out o fuck.
It got weird I got a phone call while looking at porn and the video started playing while on the phone full on porn audio.
I called him Oliver all night
His name is Brandon
Dude... Those don't even start with the same letter...
Randomize
