he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
Is it a bad sign when i blow my nose && can smell vodka?
I just saw a girl wearing a flannel shirt that would make 1992 cringe
Not really fighting over the same girl. He takes her out to dinner and then I come over and fuck her. We've worked out the perfect relationship.
Now she's making me sit here and look at pictures of guys she likes who look like bears. She's calling them her bear friends.
Bombed my 8 a.m. exam and the liquor store doesn't open till noon. Drinking unfinished beers from last night till they open.
Just did a slip and slide down a five story staircase in my dorm. Being an engineer is fucking awesome
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
Theres a 75% chance I'm wearing a hocky mask and nothing else right now
Ps I am
okay. well, yeah. i'm a mess and a half. this shit is not what dumbledore died for.
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
Maybe it's because I walked straight up to that shelf of vodka with a look of determination that said "I mean business".
I usually have to have a cart! If that doesn't say "I mean business" then I don't know what does
I have a bandage in my ass crack. In. My. Ass. Crack.
my roommate had drunk sex above me in our bunk bed and then built me a fort to apologize the next day
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