u cheatin on me?
if i did i would try to upgrade babe.
I just fell asleep with a sandwich in my mouth at Cosi..people definitely saw
I'm at the airport and there's a guy wearing all camoflash to go hunting .. Should I bump in to him and say woahh sorry didn't see you there?
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
So here i am dipping ice cream in my vodka and watching the bad girls club on demand. This is not ok
it looks like my getting laid tonight is going to depend on my knowledge of native birds. this is a weird party
Can't decide if I want to watch full house or the fleet wood Mac concert during the presidential debate.
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
The last thing I remember is him yelling from across the room "WE FINISHED THE HANDLE!"
It was 11pm.
Lemme put it this way babe, at point you were naked in Target.
Where were you?
Laughing
Dude. Woke up this morning wearing that chick's panties. 8/10, would recommend. I love tequila.
Woke up. Found about 20 condoms upstairs. A hole in the couch. Bread on the floor. Going back to sleep.
I am listening to Jack Johnson and wearing the sweater your Mother made me fuck mother nature I am in my happy place right now
Randomize
