i dont remember who you are as you are in my phone as "mr. peanut."
is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
Remember how we wr so drunk last nite we cldnt find whr i shot my load? ...found some of it.
I was told u were the one who could explain to me why i woke up in the running shower, still in my dress and heels
its really sad that i have to specifically make this a rule but, absolutely no lighting smoke bombs indoors at my birthday party.
Were you paying girls to come up and grab my cock and tell me I look like bradley Cooper?
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
other than the jail part I had a really good time with you
Purse pizza: the pizza you buy before the club, and you eat on the train home. I thought you knew me by now!
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
We could have a classy candlelight sonic dinner with fireball cocktails if you leave now. Twat tickler centerpieces.
Was i rolling around in a parking lot last night
Welp just ran into my high school history teacher while buying a pregnancy test...there goes my veil of innocence in this town.
there were rolls with just one bite out of each one leading to the bedroom. you were laying on the bed naked and yelled 'you did it you followed the bread crumbs!'
I don't think he knows you can have sex sober...
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