He looked like the mexican version of Steve Carrell with a unibrow.
I hope mine doesn't look like that
reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
I just masterbated while imagining him getting hit by a truck. I have hit a completely unacceptable level of anger & bitterness. Help.
On my way home right now. I miss you. let's cuddle. whiskey.
he locked me out then poked me with a fork when i tried to get in through the window
Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
I am never taking advice from you again. The high heels in the shower were a bad idea. I orgasmed and almost drowned.
She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.
Dad just showed up on someone else's golf cart, filled an ice chest with booze and left while yelling "SHINANIGANS!!!!" this is going no where fast.
You had a hot dog outside the bar then made me stop at McDonald's for a double quarter pounder. I'd say you've more than filled your drunken meat quota.
PLEASE DON'T BE HEARTLESS COME AND GET ME FROM THE BAR I'M HIGH AS SHIT AND I LOST MY SHOES
That tingly feeling you're experiencing in your lady parts is my mustache. All the ladies of America are waking up feeling the same thing. You're welcome.
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
Despite how often it occurs, I have absolutely no interest in having sex with myself
Randomize
