And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
I think my hot accountant is wearing banana republic. I miss the days when that ='ed gay. Signals are so confusing now.
I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
dude are you gonna smoke tonight? my day was shit and I wanna get high
worker bees can leave....even drones can fly away....the queen is their slave
nevermind....I'm on the way
You can't just say things like "great depression theme party" and then not respond.
While I was banging her, her cell rang. She checked to see who it was, answered it, and moaned, "I'm dumping you."
He's spent his last 3 years working at Urban Outfitters. No, I'm not sad I missed out on a life of mustaches, the dollar menu and shitty scarves.
I'm puking to John Mayor, save me. Or at least change it to somethong beyyt
we're using his nephews tonka truck toy as a cooler for the beer
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
I just baptized the girl next to me. LONG LIVE THE CHURCH OF VODKA
Tony's mom to him at breakfast: "I found the shirt you wore last night in the bushes this morning."
I apparently tried to wax off my nipples.This explains the pain
Thanks to you I can't show my boobs tomorrow for the interview.
You came in wearing a whipped cream bikini what did you think would happen
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
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