I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
went thru the pain of a Brazilian and he's passed the fuck out while i eat Doritos and watch tbs. fuck married life i want out
Close your eyes and stop texting and think about puppies. You'll be fine.
Just found a uh poem I wrote on ambien. It says to "cry your seamen filled tears" and "I hope you take a dagger to your vagina" and at the end it says "sincerely, God". What.the.fuck do they put in that pill?
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
Apparently I tried my hand at mustard juggling. I wasn't very good.
Girl I love you like I've been drinking all day
I can't help the fact that i'm turned on by white boys that look like Jesus
My little brother found me on Instagram. If I'm not already the shame of my family, I'm about to be.
In two separate occurrences, I could have avoided getting my heart broken, and chlamydia, all with a left swipe.
Your roommates will be treating you to many anecdotes about my intentions to have aggressive sex with you. I'm sorry in advance.
I used to sleep with a guy on the USA rugby team... He stole my credit card and my Hitman DVD. I'm more upset about the Hitman DVD..
She was on top, but I lost her at "alright, you look like predator."
you said you were going to the bathroom. we found you an hour later laying in the backyard clutching a bottle of vodka while singing the beatles and crying
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