I drove to Chevron at noon and the Hatian lady goes "Oh, nothing to drink yet white boy?"
i think he drugged the pie. i'll get back to you on that later.
When I try to close my eyes ibwant to puke. Going to the basement to watch pocohantas. That'll keep myeyes open. And puke free.
Babe. Honestly. Trust me. Your balls are not that big. And i'm eager.
We are going all out this weekend. My liver is already smiling.
Exactly. Because my vagina can't be consoled with words. It requires a thicker form of communication
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
Note to self. Don't order a $10 bottle of wine on a 40 min flight because it seems like a good deal.
God you're perfect.
I am. So drunk right now. Good work, Frontier.
Bitch are you kidding? 2016 is gonna be the year our pussies run for president
It was an interesting experience to have sex while there was a triathlon going on right outside my bedroom window because it sounded like everyone is cheering for you in bed.
How supportive!
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
I don't know what the hell I'm going to do with myself when this is all over. I'll probably just go back to smoking pot and trying to learn italian.
Dude, the worst part is I can't even pretend it didn't happen because she posted a video of it on Facebook.
What use have I for dignity? It just get's in the way of the really fun stuff.
She could hold her breath for a long time. Best underwater blowjob ever.
Randomize
