its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
You need Jesus like Tony Danza needs another hit show.
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
I'm eating lunch next to a table of beautiful culturally-diverse women chattering away happily. It's like sitting next to a Yaz commercial.
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
I'm over this relationship. I'm just going to get drunk all day, wake up in a puddle of my own vomit again, and go on with my life
Hey remember that night when you sang Fergie to me? I think that's the exact moment in time when the thought "I could be faithful to this man" came into serious consideration.
He ripped off his socks and ran around the basement barefoot. His feet turned black. Then he chugged Parmesan cheese. He chugged dry cheese dude.
Holy shit I've found my last one night stand in my Gran's knitting club
It's no shave November. This is our time.
yea so the plan to relive our college glory days was great and all but ending up in the er with alcohol poisoning was crossing the line
Sometimes you wanna cuddle and sometimes you wanna get blown in the bathroom.
Last thing I remember at your house last night is your dad leaning on the beer pong table and saying "you guys can fucking party"
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
Nothing quite like spending your evening singing Shania Twain I Feel Like a Woman barbershop quartet Style with some homeless guys outside of Keyport liquor. love Shania Twain. How's your Sunday?
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