Stuck behind a lady in her 70's purchasing a plastic handle of vodka and nothing else. She is writing a check. Hello future.
youre totally missing out on eating your boogers right now. my entire face is numb
Eventually evolution will just give us a better liver anyway, so our great great grandkids should THANK us for our binge drinking.
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
That bad?
Full length cargo pants, running shoes, and a partial unibrow. Alcohol really is blinding.
I tried to bribe him with road head and his toothbrush.
The sun and I are not on speaking terms this morning
Apparently she has a 10 week old kid, which would explain the hallway effect I was feeling.
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
We held a candle light vigil outside the jail hoping for her release, until we realized we were drunk in the jail parking lot.
It's Been a while since I puked in vomit bush. I hope it doesn't feel neglected
The ecstacy made me so dehydrated I started licking condensation off car windows
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
He walked into me masturbating to a framed picture of Bill Murray riding a t-rex
Apparently his version of saying "I'm Sorry" is streaking around our apartment building then asking for a blow job.....
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