No, I can't hang out with Dave because he already has a girlfriend. The one with the tatoos of cherries on her "cherry." Yeah, she doesn't really make me feel spectacularly comfortable.
how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
the boobs are fake... i feel like i just found out santa isn't real.
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
I just figured out that you can toast a marshmallow with a butter knife and a cigarette lighter. I'm like a retarded Mister Wizard
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
How's your threesome situation going?
Optimistic
YOU SHOULD HAVE BEEN THE FIRST VISITOR TO CHRISTMASLAND
Once again, marijuana saves me from going to jail
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
Is it something I'm going to want to hug you for or slap you for?
are you really asking me this. do you KNOW how many times i masturbate in a day? yeah. wrong person to ask about romance.
That Spanish guy who looks like Ben Affleck from that club we went to 3 weeks ago is still texting me.. He clearly doesn't remember what I look like.
Randomize