capt morgan doesn't hurt if you honestly believe it's golden flavored kool-aid.
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
My dad caught me fucking in the pool last night. He proceeded to tell me I needed to "quiet things down" while this guys dick was still in me. Worst daughter ever.
My addiction to golf is getting out of hand....I just caught myself swinging my dick like a putter while peeing.
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
I heard moaning and ass slapping and sponge bob.
Well when I got home you were sitting at the table eating cold, leftover taco meat. I'd say you were pretty far gone by that time.
He was just lying in his underwear like a present. I had to unwrap it.
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
Don't worry I sent a creepy stalker message to a guy I slept with 6 years ago, Sunday Funday rock bottom
This is the second time this month a hookup cried when I left...bro get your shit together bar does NOT equal wife 😬
I'm recovering from the blowjob...She's doing her taxes...
Left my wallet at the store. Wouldn't have noticed if the joint I just rolled wasn't in it.
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
In other news there's 12 shirtless Korean dudes all trying to jump on a tiny little trampoline so that's entertaining
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