i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
Strawberries are so good its weird that food is growable
It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
You have to understand, this is the first time I'm looking at a whopper sober.
Could you please tell them to stop whispering "thundercunt" every time I walk in the room?
He just made a mudslide using rubinoff and swiss miss packets. This can't end well....
My TA just came over to give us drugs. Now he's drinking grey goose with my roommate and explaining his thesis to her. This is too much.
at that time a 4 pound meatball stuffed with pizza rolls seemed more important than bailing you out of jail.... sorry.
I just fucked her in her boyfriends bathroom... he was in the room sleeping.
She's posted my bail. Twice. Of course I'm going to be her wing girl.
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
That's like.....u just dangled a sex carrot in front of me then took it away!
Throwing up in a storm drain... Not my finest moment.
But my shoes looked boss
Will you PLEASE get your mom to stop telling me I'd make a great husband? She knows I'm gay, right?!
I know, but she really likes you. Have you met my brother yet?
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