in vegas stuck in the middle of a pride right now
Pride?
thats a pack of cougars
go fuck yourself
once he started yelling at me in latin, i wasn't sure what we were fighting about anymore...
it's like iHOP with fire
she just threw a smoke bomb in an elevator and ran down 9 flights of stairs to see it at the bottom.
She is chewing on staples and spitting them at her cat, I think it's time to leave..
Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
I told him I'd rather have sex with his father last night. I'll admit now that I was drunk.
He just showed me a video of his erect penis moving to the beet of the music when he was high, I think I'm in love.
I thought she was being abused so tried to go in at the sympathy angle, but the bruises were from pole dancing. I went in at all angles.
future-me showed up mid trip and gave us a thumbs up.
They shouted last call and the guy next to me and I looked each other up and down and went in unison "yup, you'll do"
I just did a line of coke with an Olympic bronze medallist. I guess we know why he only got bronze.
You paid a stripper $40 to choke me out last night.
I'm about to eat a 2month old weed brownie I just found in my lax duffel bag. will you answer if I call you in like an hour and a half
We got stoned and took selfies with the most perfect lawn
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